Runners Low today???

I just ran the California run 10km. I did pretty well considering I had not run 10km in about 2 years. I did it in 56:22 and my knee did not hurt.

I could have run the 5km but figured that I would want to race it. Running the 10km and knowing I had to go slow to make it FORCED me to stay slow and not hurt myself. That's runners logic for you. Run longer so I don't hurt myself. Makes sense to me ;)

I have to admit that I am experiencing a runners 'low' right now. I normally am on such a high after a run. Today was different and I'm not sure why. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I went to the race by myself and I didn't have anyone to share the experience with. It was quite lonely. I did know about 4 people but all of them are part of the local running group and could not have cared less that I was there. I don't think they meant to be as rude as they were but that is how I felt. Oh well. Perhaps I needed to be more outgoing and assertive. Maybe they think I'm a snob and didn't want to talk to them?? Who knows. Most people don't go out of their way to be rude...they just get caught up with their own thing. Maybe that is the case here.

I think NOT being part of a running group is the real issue here. In Kingston I had that. I had the support and encouragement and felt a part of something. I was able to share with others my love of running. I try to do things for myself but I feel super guilty when I leave the kids with other people for 3 hrs at a time for various reasons. I know I need time to myself and time to do the things I love but it is hard when it is MY 'job' to be here. Besides... I DO want to be here to feed them supper and put them to bed every night. They will only be small once....So I just hang on to the idea that some day...some day I'll have time to train for my marathon. Some day I'll have the time that I want to put into it.

I'm just tired. It's Sunday today and I'm going to rest.