O.K. So we have been battling a flu bug around here for a few days. I'm better, but my kids all have 'The Diarrhea' as my four year old calls it.
I'm pretty darn tired. In fact I have been in bed at 7:30pm and asleep by 8pm for the last two nights. To be woken in the night by someone screaming or on the toilet.
My point is that I'm more tired than normal. Oh wait. I'm also growing a human in my belly aren't I?
So...I need to nap.
In fact I needed to nap this morning at 8:30am.
BUT...I have 3 children to take care of. Actually, make that 2 girls that play great and 1 VERY ACTIVE DESTROY EVERYTHING/LICK EVERYTHING/TOUCH EVERYTHING/FLUSH EVERYTHING TODDLER.
I cannot POSSIBLY lay on the couch for a 5 minute shut eye.
So...I have been doing what I thought I would NEVER DO. For the last 3 days I've been taking said toddler up to my room, turning on HGTV and cuddling him. VOILA!!!! 1 sleeping toddler and 1 rest for me.
I don't care man, I've had two two hour rests today. If that is how I'm gonna be able to put my feet up I'll do it. A tired mama has to do what a tired mama has to do.
So what if now he screams at night till I pick him up and bring him to bed with me?
So what if now I have created a toddler that may need to watch t.v before he sleeps?
SO WHAT if sometimes I will not have the time to lay down with him, risking him not napping at all?
So what if now after watching all this HGTV I now NEEEEEEEEED to fix up my house?
I'm trying to look at it this way. I just need to make it through the day in this first trimester. and I have a confession to make...
I absolutely love the closeness Peyton and I are enjoying together everyday. He won't be my baby forever and I know now that all too soon he will grow up and not want to cuddle with me. A part of me if LOVING it. I'm listening to my heart and not my head and I'm o.k with that. I want my son to know that I'm there. That I'm mommy and will cuddle him ALWAYS when he wants it. I'm glad that my tiredness is allowing him so much more of ME right now.
So for now Mom will sleep when the Toddler Sleeps and I'm O.K with that.